After nearly forty years of loyal service, Postman Pat is retiring.

On his final round he visits his first house and is invited in for a cup of tea and a freshly baked cake.

The next house presents him a bottle of fine single malt whisky.

Next, he's given a sold silver letter opener and given a toast.

This goes on all morning, until he gets to Mr and Mrs Smith's house.

Pat is just about to post the letters, when Mrs Smith flings open the door, wearing a really sexy lingerie.
She pulls Pat into the kitchen, lays him on the table and proceeds to give him teh most mind blowing sex he's had for years.

Afterwards, she makes him a fry-up.

As Pat is finishing his braekfast, she hands him a £5 note.

Whats this for?, Pat asks

Well, when I asked my husband what to give you, he said F*ck him- give him a fiver.
The breakfast was my idea.

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"The Bhoys are back in town!!"