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One evening, two elderly women that lived in the retirement home were out on the patio after dinner enjoying a smoke. Not long after, it began to rain. One of the ladies withdrew a condom from her coat pocket and a pair of scissors. She proceeded to unroll the condom and snipped the tip of it off with the scissors, then slid it over her cigarette.

Her friend was staring at her with bewilderment. "What is that?" she asked? To which her friend replied, "It's a condom, you moron." Her friend quickly retorted, "I knew what it was, I mean, why are you using it?" Her friend then gestured up into the sky, "The rain silly, it keeps my smoke dry, look at your own, it's all soggy!"

True enough, her friend's cigarette was ruined, soaked through from the rain after only a brief moment. Then, she asked "Do you have another condom?"

"No," her friend replied "but the gas station on the corner sells them in boxes of 3. You should pick some up"

So the next day, before dinner, the elderly woman strolled up the the gas station on the corner and walked into the grocery part of the store. She walked over to the condom section and was just amazed, she had never purchased condoms before, and decided that she needed assistance. She approached the young man behind the counter and asked "Excuse me son, I need some assistance with some condoms."

The youth behind the counter, barely 18, was rather embarrassed by this woman who seemed to be in her 80's asking for assistance with condoms.

"Well ma'am, what can I help you with? They come in a variety of sizes and colors, do you have any preference?"

"Sonny, I don't care how big they are or what color they are, just as long as it is big enough to slide over a Camel."

05-18-2007, 09:00 PM	#8
Fisher Veteran Offline --> Posts: 217 --> Join Date: Aug 2006	One evening, two elderly women that lived in the retirement home were out on the patio after dinner enjoying a smoke. Not long after, it began to rain. One of the ladies withdrew a condom from her coat pocket and a pair of scissors. She proceeded to unroll the condom and snipped the tip of it off with the scissors, then slid it over her cigarette. Her friend was staring at her with bewilderment. "What is that?" she asked? To which her friend replied, "It's a condom, you moron." Her friend quickly retorted, "I knew what it was, I mean, why are you using it?" Her friend then gestured up into the sky, "The rain silly, it keeps my smoke dry, look at your own, it's all soggy!" True enough, her friend's cigarette was ruined, soaked through from the rain after only a brief moment. Then, she asked "Do you have another condom?" "No," her friend replied "but the gas station on the corner sells them in boxes of 3. You should pick some up" So the next day, before dinner, the elderly woman strolled up the the gas station on the corner and walked into the grocery part of the store. She walked over to the condom section and was just amazed, she had never purchased condoms before, and decided that she needed assistance. She approached the young man behind the counter and asked "Excuse me son, I need some assistance with some condoms." The youth behind the counter, barely 18, was rather embarrassed by this woman who seemed to be in her 80's asking for assistance with condoms. "Well ma'am, what can I help you with? They come in a variety of sizes and colors, do you have any preference?" "Sonny, I don't care how big they are or what color they are, just as long as it is big enough to slide over a Camel." __________________ I Am Pilot Error... I Am Fetal Distress... I Am The Random Chromosome... I Am Complete And Total Madness... I Am Fear!